Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Randomize
