You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
