She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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