He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Randomize