Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize
