One girl and one boy is just not enough.
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
