If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize