last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize
