The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize