I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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