I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize
