I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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