apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
Randomize
