she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
