Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
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