I feel like I'm in dance class right now
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Randomize
