We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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