Whod you bang
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Randomize
