Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
