I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
We were destined to go to rehab together
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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