Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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