i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
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