If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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