I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
Randomize
