I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Randomize
