Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
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