I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
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