can we get nightvision for the apartment?
So i just got diagnosed with swine flu. im at walgreens looking like shit and this guy keeps staring at me. Im so gonna cough in his face.
well, dont
I didnt. i just coughed then looked at him menacingly. he got it.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
