brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
