Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize
