Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
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