FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
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