I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Randomize
