Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Randomize
