Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
