Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
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