Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Alive.
So much puke
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
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