I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
