Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
