The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
