That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
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