Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize
