Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
