Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Randomize