Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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