He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
