that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
