who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize