they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Randomize
