There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Randomize
