do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
