belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
It's rum buckets o'clock
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
we should paint friendship bongs
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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