can we get nightvision for the apartment?
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
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